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Wendy and the Lunchtime Lechers

by Mickey 

Posted: 01 April 2008
Word Count: 119
Summary: Harriet Harperson’s latest outrageous intrusion into our lives reminded me of this. Some of you may have seen it before. I’ve just e-mailed it to the Daily Mail but I imagine the last line will preclude its publication!


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Wendy works the lunchtime shift,
and gives the punters quite a lift,
in the wine bar where she works
dispensing lunches. In split skirt
she raises lunchtime temperatures
of middle-aged bank managers.

While serving up their plates of quiche
to businessmen who, off the leash
of wives, and kids, and mortgage worries,
passions hot as Indian curries,
leer at her with bulging eyes,
while busy munching cold pork pies.

And loudly telling sexual fables,
while poor Wendy’s waiting tables.
(She knows when they’re not on the loose,
they wouldn’t say ‘boo’ to a goose!)

So as she’s busy serving food,
she has to brave the comments lewd.
But, in the kitchen, she derides
“They wouldn’t touch the bloody sides!”






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Comments by other Members



joanie at 18:28 on 01 April 2008  Report this post
Great, Mike, as always! They do beg to be read aloud, don't they?

I love the play on words of Lunchtime Lechers! A friend of mine was a lecturer at the FE College here and his son once wrote (honestly!) that his dad was a 'lecherer'!

Why Wendy? Any particular reason?? I can't resist asking.

Joan

Mickey at 09:29 on 02 April 2008  Report this post
This banter and quick repartee
is what made Britons Great and free.
Today, though, this would never do
and Wendy ('traumatized' would sue!

Absolutely no reason for Wendy, Joanie, it just seemed to fit the title.

Ooh-er. I've just previewed this response and the close bracket keeps replacing itself with a smiley! (perhaps the computer thought the poem amusing?)


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