AND THERE HE LAY

by  Emotion  ( 2380 )

Posted: 07 August 2010
Word Count: 76


Font Size
 


Printable Version
Print Double spaced


And there he lay
a sobbing voice beside
told the story tale

I saw a crumpled body
a plum coloured head
a cord digging into
the noosed neck

this was death
and death was all

what bizare thoughts
had troubled the soon dead brain
what and how grotesque
he saw his battles end
his mother's woe

and tomorrow he will raise
no head from the pillow
no day in his head
and no waking mother's son






Add to WriteWords bookmarks Bookmark this work
Add to WriteWords author bookmarks Bookmark this Author
Email a friend!Tell a friend


Comments by other Members


Posted by :  woodsville at 13:16 on 08 August 2010
A very difficult situation from which to wring every emotion, however it seems that you have managed it.

I wonder if the 4th verse beginning with what.. should be turned into his mother's perspective to remove the context and keep it focused on the grief. Just a thought..

Patrick


To post comments you need to become a member. If you are already a member, please log in .