Printed from WriteWords -

Henry Hunter & The WaterMotch


Posted: Saturday, June 12, 2004
Word Count: 1727
Summary: This is an early chapter of a childrens fiction I am in the process of writing. The basic story revolving around a boy who hunts Monsters. Please tell me what you think? all feedback, no matter how cruel will be appreciated!


Henry Horrid the young Monster Hunter, had not been eaten by the Water Motch, as the Motch never ate anything except teeth, which was well known in the World of Monsters. Instead, he had met a much crueller fate than this, because he had become, a prisoner of the Monster.

Henry did not know where the Motch had taken him but suspected it was deep underground as he awoke to find himself stuck in a thick slush of slime. He wiped the slime off his eyes, and could see he was inside a big cave which was damp, wet and felt moist from steam and he noticed the bits of large and small rusty pipes partly visible in the walls. There was a dim neon blue glow coming from the ceiling and Henry looked up to see it glowing from what seemed like slime pasted onto it and some dripped down in huge blobs onto the rough cave ground. Henry then knew what he already dreaded; this was not an ordinary cave, as it was the den of the Water Motch deep under Penrose Town. With this thought in his mind, he fought to get free of the slime and clambered up a small hill of rocks, and when he fell onto the other side, Henry gasped at what he saw in front of him. In an open space, the Water Motch lay nestled upon a small mountain of thousands and thousands of teeth of all shapes and sizes. There were human teeth, animal teeth and the teeth of monsters, but Henry’s attention fell onto the Water Motch as it nestled on top, asleep. Now that he could see all of it, the Motch was even more monstrous than he had ever imagined, it had long thick legs like that of a spider which explained how the creature managed to attack Fay Dooley in her bedroom.
But, Henry thought there was no time for explanations or examinations of the monster as Henry had a job to complete which he thought was done in his bathroom, but clearly the potion had not worked on this menacing abomination. Henry thought about what Miss Penny had said that if the Water Motch became too big, then the potion would not work. But what had happened was in the past, what needed to be done was in the present, and he knew exactly what needed to be done.
But Henry had no sword, so he quietly moved towards the huge pile of teeth as the Motch slept on them, and began trying to find one which could become a suitable replacement for his task. He cautiously searched through the bones and examined a few possible winners, but they were too thin or too small and he frustratingly looked on, and at the same time kept a watch full eye on the Water Motch. As he searched, he thought how long it must have took the monster to collect so much teeth, and the greed that drove its obsession, and about the breathtaking battles it must have fought to gain some of the giant teeth which were here. Then, after a few minutes of searching, Henry found a long sharp Dragon tooth and thought it would have to do as his sword. He looked at the Motch which made a low hissing sound every few minutes as it slept, and Henry knew this moment presented him with an excellent opportunity to end the Motch quickly. So, Henry slowly climbed the mountain of teeth and reached as close as he could get, right next to its giant closed eyes. He raised the Dragon tooth, ready to strike and end this nightmare, when suddenly the eyes sprang open and Henry stared at his reflection in their marble blackness, before he could react, the Motch screeched and knocked him down onto the cave floor with a thrash from one of its arms. Henry quickly crawled towards the rocks as the Water Motch lifted itself up and stepped with a single bound from the tooth mountain and towered over Henry.
The Motch hissed and stared at him with its black eyes, then, to Henry’s surprise, its fat mouth curled into a sly grin, and the Water Motch spoke!
“Nice try, but you won’t get me that easily…” It hissed like a snake. However, Henry was not that surprised it could talk, as most monsters could. The Motch grinned showing its pointy sharp teeth and hissed again, “…And I wouldn’t bother with anymore potions if I wasss you…useless against me…”
Henry hid the Dragon tooth behind him and stared meaningfully at the monster, “Thanks for the tip, but I’ve got something else in mind.”
“…Have you and what’s that then?”
“You’ll find out soon..” Henry spoke and gripped the tooth tighter, “…I can see you’ve been busy?” The Motch rolled one of its eyes proudly at the teeth and stroked them with one of its arms, “Very busy indeed, what do you think, nice collection isn’t it?” The Motch spoke with that twisting smirk. “Sorry, I’m not into collecting teeth…”
“No, then what are you, into collecting then?” There was a tense silence, the Water Motch waiting for a reply and Henry got ready to give one, “MONSTERS!” He shouted and hurled the Dragon tooth like a spear, but the Motch was quick and deflected it with its arms and then, went for Henry. He jumped out of the way as the creature tried to stab him with its long legs, Henry rolled under the Motch and it stabbed at him again and again making him roll from one place to the other in a dance to avoid the sharp legs. The creature hissed and shrieked angrily then swung its arms to force the young Hunter from under it, Henry knew it was too risky staying under the Motch as the legs became impossible to avoid and he jumped out and crashed into the tooth mountain, the Water Motch swiped at him but Henry jumped out of the way and the teeth went scattering everywhere from the impact of the arms. This drove the Motch into a rage and it attacked, swung, stabbed and swiped at him with increasing hatred, Henry couldn’t avoid the stabbing legs as they came at him like daggers and the whipping arms anymore, and he suddenly staggered forward from a hit. The Water Motch instantly scurried over him and Henry grabbed a rock and flung it as hard as he could, but it just bounced off the monster and before he could get away, the Motch wrapped one of its arms around him like a snake. “No escape this time!” it shrieked and squeezed Henry, but, this was not the only pain he felt as the arm began squeezing tighter, he could feel the suckers on it attach to his skin and pump something into his body. It was Water Motch poison, which the monster used sometimes to paralyze prey that put up a fight as Henry did, so it could munch on their teeth at its leisure.
Young Henry could feel himself going weak and stiff as this poison polluted his body, it almost felt like the sensation before he fell to sleep, a lazy and dreamy feeling, which he could give into easily. As the poison took hold, and Henry’s struggle slowly slowed, the Motch eased its tight grip and Henry slid down limp onto the ground. With his last ounce of strength, he tried to hopelessly crawl away, the Motch hissed at this pleasurably and let him try as it knew there was no escape for the young Hunter now. Henry, then gave up as he could no longer move his body because it became too heavy. His eyes began slowly closing from the sleep that was taking over, and Henry Horrid, the young Monster Hunter, thought to himself in this dreamy state, was this the end? Then, the Water Motch moved towards his paralyzed body for its most prized feast it had fought for.

Henry didn’t know if he was dreaming it, but a sudden thunderous roar rang through his ears and echoed violently in the cave. It shook him awake and he could feel the thud of something heavy and powerful land on the rocks in front of him, he could hear the breathing and fearsome growls of something over him, and as Henry painfully lifted his head, he saw a site which made his heart jump in joy and fear at the same time.
Standing over Henry like a mountain, was his powerful and mighty friend, Azbhar the Yeti.
The Water Motch hissed and moved back at the sight of the giant Azbhar who was built with huge strong muscles and towered eight feet tall. The Yeti Bear had a glowing white fur which blazed with light in the dark blue cave, he also carried a giant silver sword like a knight ready to face a Dragon. Azbhar roared again showing his sharp teeth and then jumped over Henry and launched a monstrous attack at the Water Motch. Henry was in a state between sleep and awake, and could hear the roars of the Yeti Azbhar, the shrieks of the Water Motch and the powerful sweeps of the silver sword. The Motch swung its arms at Azbhar but it was no use as he sliced its legs off and the monster staggered onto the mountain of teeth, Azbhar growled with anger and ended the Water Motch with one strong blow from his sword, it cried out, but this faded away, and the only sound came from the Yeti’s breathing which sounded like a monstrous engine powering down.
The Water Motch lay on its giant tooth mountain, dead, its rain of terror in Penrose Town finally come to an end.

Henry had heard all this like a distant echo as the poison of the Motch took hold, then he felt himself being lifted up by powerful arms and could feel the warmth of Azbhar the Yeti’s white fur. He heard its strong deep voice speak, “Azzmiddah” and then felt himself spin as if he was inside a tornado, he tried to open his eyes and glimpsed a golden shimmer of swirling light flicker, and then, darkness had overcome him.

© 2004 Umar Ashraf