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Immortal Download

by ruperty 

Posted: 23 May 2009
Word Count:
Summary: A satirical, science fiction story set in the year 2044, in the tradition of Blade Runner, The Terminator and The Six Million Dollar Man: a tale of greed, corruption, absolute power, self-exploration, lost humanity, love and, ultimately, redemption.


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Comments by other Members



NMott at 14:54 on 26 May 2009
My experience is with synopses for novels, so I can't comment on format on this treatment and some of my comments will be extrapolations from novel synopses so feel free to disregard completely.

Biography:
For novels this is usually a paragraph on the covering letter and the emphasis is on what qualifies the writer to write this mss otherwise it's left blank (it's not a job VC) so the most important part is any previous publications, including magazine articles, flash or short stories, or writing competition wins or placements. Family and job should be kept to a minimum unless there is a direct correlation between that and the written work, eg, a primary school teacher writing for children, and actor/comedian writing a screenplay. Hobbies are not important unless, eg, it's with your local amateur dramatic society. If you are writing a screenplay, then do you have any experience writing for your local theatre, radio? Any University, club or Fringe performances?



Synopsis

Immortal Download is a satirical, science fiction story set in the year 2044, in the tradition of Blade Runner, The Terminator and The Six Million Dollar Man


Usually, when pitching a screenplay, the writer picks two films for comparison because you need to grab the producer's interest immediately with a 30 second pitch: eg, just to make up an absurd scenario: "it's Star Trek (strong Sci-Fi element) meets Hannah Montana (bubbly teen singing star hiding her true identify for a normal life; some comedy).
I'm not sure The Terminator is the right Arnie film to choose here. The synopsis has elements of two of his other films, Total Recall (mission to Mars) and The 6th Day (cloning). Another problem with the 3 you've chosen is none are satire (despite the bad acting in Six Million Doller Man ; ).
One thing I didn't get from the synopsis was a strong thread of satire (aka Mars Attacks), eg, why does the main character's body get shipped off to India? And why is India sending up US Space Shuttles? Would a US audience be interested in Tony Blair?

You say 'Film treatment' so I'm assuming you're aiming for a big screen production. Kudos to you. Good luck.



- NaomiM




<Added>

apologies for the typos.

<Added>

Got this list of recommended titles for screenplay writers from another writers website as they may be useful to you:

'Four Screenplays' by Syd Field
'The Writer's Journey' by Christopher Vogler
'How Not to Write a Screenplay' by Denny Martin Flinn

Jubbly at 09:55 on 29 June 2009
I will definitely read and comment on this during the week, just letting you know you aren't being igored. Thanks for posting.

J

ruperty at 18:29 on 03 July 2009
Hi Jubbly,

I notice you are a comedy writer. I have uploaded some comedy material and would be interested in your views on whether it has potential, and if you know where would be appropriate places to send it.

Regards,
Rupert


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