Login   Sign Up 



 

The Three Wrongs

by dadzie 

Posted: 29 January 2007
Word Count: 1192
Summary: Revised synopsis - hopefully posted properly this time


Font Size
 


Printable Version
Print Double spaced


The Three Wrongs

BRIEF SYNOPSIS

FICTION – PSYCHOLOGICAL THRILLER
62,000 WORDS
by GLENN WILSON

The Three Wrongs follows soon-to-be bankrupt James Neill fighting and then using circumstance to commit, what he considers as being, the perfect crime by making a shocking ‘reality’ film.

James discovers a schoolbook on a park bench. Inside is a ghost story called “The Three Wrongs” about a young girl who is killed in an accident but is not allowed into heaven until she rights three major wrongs she had committed in her life. So she comes back to earth as a ghost to correct the wrongs. James fantasizes about creating the film and a dream shows him the path to do this. The writer, twelve year old Claire O’ Connell, unwittingly becomes central role in his film.

The book is set into three main parts with timelines running adjacent. The first part, written first-party and present tense, follows the making of James’ film and all the thought process that develop as a result. It opens with James sitting on a park bench reflecting on his broken life. He notices two girls talking and realises that one has left her schoolbook on the bench. In the first few chapters explores the mind of the main character and it is easy to feel sympathetic to him. Though very soon James decides to turn his fantasy to reality. He captures Claire on her way home from school using a hired van and using Claire’s parents as his alibi. James befriends Claire to find out three wrongs that she committed in her own life. He starts to feel an attachment to her but his plan is to kill her and go about to emulate her ghost, using his alter ego to film the reactions to the people affected by the righting of her wrongs. He cons his way into several houses (including Claire’s) by convincing families that his company is making a reality TV show. Therefore he has an excuse to put cameras into Claire’s house. Claire’s death occurs through a fit of rage but circumstance kindly opens doors for James in order for him to make his film. In helping police with their inquiries and staying one step ahead of them at all times James thinks, as the reader does, that he has got away with it, until he sees Claire’s Father on his land. Claire’s real ghost has led him to James.

The second part of the book is Claire’s parent’s story. As James emulates one ghost, Claire’s real ghost is leading Claire’s Father to the truth. In this part of the book you realise just how ironic so many of the incidental happenings in the first part of the book had such a big effect on circumstance without James realising. This part of the book is the real film as Claire’s parents tell the tale to Hollywood maverick Marcus Ritchie. What becomes so apparent is that you realise how many of the clues lie in the past – indeed going back years beforehand. It is not simply a case of telling the same story through different eyes but it is an insight into the feelings the parents feel in coming to terms with their daughter’s disappearance and murder. Claire’s father Michael describes how he followed his heart, believing Claire’s ghost was helping him solve her murder. His investigation leads him back to France where two years earlier the family toured the Riviera. James rights his own wrong – an injustice to Claire by not returning for her trophy after she lost it by the river in Satilleau. She returns the gesture by laying clues in his thoughts and dreams – he follows the paths – never realising how close he is to uncovering the mystery sounding her murder.

What is quite disturbing though is that events seem so realistic you have to get your head around the connotations: Initially, did Claire’s ghost exist before her physical death – if so was she killed by her own ghost? These are questions Michael asks himself the more he investigates his thoughts, memories and physical clues – that were placed by James in his attempts to right Claire’s wrongs. James expects to create one effect but Michael reads these clues differently. Eventually Claire’s ghost does indeed lead Michael to James and only afterwards does Michael realise the extent of James’ motives.

The third part of the book is very short, only three pages and is Claire’s original story. Here you realise how Claire had prophesised her own destiny without even James realising how apt it would all end up being. It adds further fuel to the “Chicken and the Egg” scenario which gets created in the book.

The epilogue to the book has another massive double-twist – it’s a loop-round –– The only question unanswered by James’ actions to Claire’s Father is how James discovered the book in the first place – The epilogue finds Michael in an identical situation to James and the book ends with the reader looping round to the beginning and answering the other unanswered questions about how circumstance is able to lead the path it does. And once again, the “Chicken and the egg” scenario starts all over again.

Geographically the book is set within a fictitious town of Tensfield within the Lake District area of England but many of the other places are real. James makes the film in the Glencoe area of Scotland and I have tried to keep much of the aesthetic feel and beauty of his surroundings as I can, even allowing the occasional historic reference. Despite the disturbing storyline I have tried to capture beauty as a running theme:- beauty of the countryside, physical beauty, beauty within the making of James’ film and even beauty in Claire’s death sequence. I am also in the latter stages of compiling a soundtrack to the book with beauty being the main theme. It’s a juxtaposition of emotion and content and I would hope that the book, especially with the music part of the overall package, would move any reader.

SUMMARY OF LAYOUT

Prologue - Single page, two paragraphs asking the reader if they would follow their own heart – even if they betrayed their conscience.
Part One The cameraman (villain)’s story – Written present tense, first party This is the main body of the book and allows you to identify with the hought processes of the character and follow his work in committing his crimes and making his film.
Part Two - The Director’s (victim’s parents) story – Written past-to-present and third party. This is the ‘real’ film and allows the reader to start to uncover the mystery surrounding what has happened in the background to allow the villain to commit the crimes he has.
Part Three - The writer’s story: Based on the schoolbook found by the villain. Only three pages and contains a chilling twist as the victim Prophesises her own fate.
Epilogue - Short two-page epilogue written present tense, first party. Written from the Victim’s father – he finds himself back at the bench where the villain first saw the victim.






Favourite this work Favourite This Author


Comments by other Members



JenDom at 23:27 on 30 January 2007  Report this post
Dadzie [you haven't linked this to any group: try linking to beginners or synopsis]

Please forgive this audacity but below is my version of your synopsis. For a 62,000 word novel, I think I am fairly confident in saying that agents/publishers would prefer a one page synopsis. Some even specify that it should be double-spaced. That leaves little room to capture the essence of your story in a few hundred words! Now I might be wrong here and am certain that someone with more experience than would soon put me right if I am.

Below is my take on your synopsis. Please read this in the spirit of constructive suggestion. I am not in anyway trying to re-write your synopsis. I am merely trying to suggest an alternative that you may or may not discard. I apologise profusely if you think that I have gone too far. This is not my intention.

************************
THREE WRONGS:

James discovers a schoolbook on a park bench. Inside is a ghost story called “The Three Wrongs” about a young girl who is killed in an accident but is not allowed into heaven until she rights three major wrongs she had committed in her life. So she comes back to earth as a ghost to correct the wrongs. James fantasizes about creating the film after a nervous breakdown when he is declared bankrupt. The writer of the story is twelve year old Claire O’ Connell.

In his depressed state, decides to turn his fantasy to reality. He
kidnaps
Claire on her way home from school. James befriends Claire to find out three wrongs that she committed in her own life. He starts to feel an attachment to her but before he is able to follow his plan, he murders Claire in a fit of rage. James is then given the perfect opportunity to recreate the story she has written He uses his alter ego to film the reactions of the people affected by the righting of her wrongs. He cons his way into several houses (including Claire’s) by convincing families that his company is making a reality TV show.

In his attempts to right the other of Claire’s James manipulates clues for his film. Her father, Michael, believes that her ghost is helping him solve her murder and is right. She returns the gesture by laying clues in his thoughts and dreams. He follows the paths – never realising how close he is to uncovering the mystery surrounding her murder. Claire’s ghost does indeed lead Michael to James and only afterwards does he realise the extent of James’ motives.

The story ends when James realises that the book he finds on the bench has been Claire's prophesy of her own death.

***************************
Jen
x


Nik Perring at 01:00 on 31 January 2007  Report this post
Dadzie,

This is a much better version, but the tone and feel of the synopsis Jen's done here is much more what agents will want - though not quite.

What she's done is convert yours into an extended blurb - which is exactly what you need to do. There's still too much info in yours - try to stick to the main points/themes/character conflicts of the novel, rather than describing everything that happens. You really don't need that much detail - just an overview of what the story's about.

I'd suggest taking the frame of what Jen's done and expanding on it a little. Not too much, maybe another quarter of a side of A4 - but make it your own.

If you'd like me to dig out the synopsis I did for my book then wwmail me and I'll try to find and send it.

Hope that's helped.

Cheers,

Nik.

PS

What is quite disturbing though is that events seem so realistic you have to get your head around the


Move away from this.

Cut everything like this that has a conversational style. EIther cut it completely or say something like: But and get into the next sentence.
And never tell a reader/agent/publisher how they'll feel. Just tell the story. They'll have read enough to know how it'll make them feel, and probably know better when they read it.

So, just tell the story. Cut all of these kind of things:

The epilogue to the book has another massive double-twist
- because if you're describing it right they'll know it's a massive twist - they don't need to be told.

Like I say - hope I've helped and not been too critical. It sounds like a really good story. And like I've said before - synopses are THE MOST DIFFICULT things a writer ever has to write.

Hope that's helped.

JenDom at 15:07 on 31 January 2007  Report this post
... also as pointed out by Cornelia, to explain the three crimes - which would of course also explain the title!

:)

Jen
x

Dee at 17:29 on 31 January 2007  Report this post
Dadzie, I agree with the comments you’ve had up to now. This is a complex plot, and difficult to explain, but do need to find a way. Jen’s version is closer, but you could still improve on it.

In this part of the book you realise just how ironic so many of the incidental happenings in the first part of the book had such a big effect on circumstance without James realising.
To reinforce what Nik said – cut out all these type of lines. DON’T tell the agent what they're supposed to realise… it should be clear from the synopsis.

Something else that’s been touched on already, but maybe needs repeating… I find it hard to accept that a 12-year old child could do so wrong.

My main problem, however, is that there’s nothing in the synopsis to make me want to relate to James. The plotline that he abducts a child, befriends her and then murders her, is unsavoury in the extreme. I'm NOT criticising you for this – there have been plenty of unsavoury plots that make thrilling novels – but you must find a way in the synopsis to draw the readers into some kind of empathy with your character. I'm sure it’s much clearer in the full ms, but you need to convey the idea in the synopsis too.

Hope this helps

Dee


Steerpike`s sister at 20:26 on 07 May 2007  Report this post
This certainly sounds intriguing and complex, but I agree with Nik that you are telling the reader how they should feel. They will get this from your writing itself.
A very interesting idea to collate a soundtrack to go with the book.


To post comments you need to become a member. If you are already a member, please log in .