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Big Al and the Goddess Parsimony

by Kipper 

Posted: 05 October 2008
Word Count: 203
Summary: Daft. But true!

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Big Al bought a round today.
The seas swam red and boiled away;
Parsimony she turned in shame
the day Big Al bought a round.

Insects from a bygone age
escaped his creaking wallet.
We gasped , we gaped, we laughed, we swore
at the awesome folly of it.

The queen (or king?) on banknotes blushed,
groats chinkered on the bar top,
ha’pennies danced with dizzy doubloons,
sestertii slipped upon the beer slops.

“For you my friends, so dear so true
(so thirsty, so expensive!)
my shout, I think, it’s only right
that I should be expansive.”

But Parsimony smirked in glee,
Silas Marner eat your heart out,
for we hadn’t noticed Time was called
when Big Al got his wad out.

The barmaid though, all brazen charm,
approached him with a grin
“What’s it to be Big Boy?” she asked
“I’m sure I’ll fit YOU in!”

Ashen appal in his alarm
as frothing ales appeared,
lagers, continental and chic,
a cornucopia of beers.

Chasers of the finest malt,
cigars by the lung-full,
rare Tibetan fermented yak’s milk,
exotic juices from the jungle.

Frugality’s loss, Bonhomie’s gain:
we partied long and late.
Parsimony threw back Big Al’s ring
and left in dark disgrace.

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Comments by other Members

Bishti at 10:02 on 06 October 2008  Report this post
excellent fun. I'm sure I know big Al

V`yonne at 20:36 on 07 October 2008  Report this post
It's very entertaining. The meter needs tweaking in place. I'm sure you can work on that, though. Nuahgty but nice ;

Epona Love at 17:42 on 12 October 2008  Report this post
This has got a good flow, that maybe could be tweeked as Y'vonne says, but still stands well. The last line of the first verse doesn't quite roll off the tounge, and in the next to last line of the poem you could maybe leave out the 'Big' and just refere to it as Al's ring(?) because it would flow better. It's an amusing poem, and very cleverly worded... especially liked the 3rd, 7th and 8th verses.

Emma x

Kipper at 13:11 on 19 October 2008  Report this post
Thank you. I take your points about the scanning, though it's just a bit of daftness: and I quite like how "rare Tibetan..." doesn't scan - kind of enhances the silliness of the line!
Yes; think everyone knows a Big Al!

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