Login   Sign Up 



 

Rite of Passage

by James Graham 

Posted: 03 March 2009
Word Count: 88
Summary: A new version of a poem I wrote several years ago.


Font Size
 


Printable Version
Print Double spaced


Rite of Passage

Late in an autumn day, when even on this hill
the air is still, I wait. Northeastward
the city shines, but I turn toward the land.

The nearer stands of grey or lichened beech
recede to distant blue; then the level sea.
In my head I hear the tide. Now ghosts

are gathering here; I am expecting them.
Stock-still in the sober gateway of death
they linger, looking back; like me

they cannot cease to see the drowsing sky,
the sweet horizon tipsy with bramble-mist.






Favourite this work Favourite This Author


Comments by other Members



V`yonne at 22:17 on 03 March 2009  Report this post
A stilll and compelling place of in between, of half light and changing season - I loved the
horizon tipsy with bramble-mist.
and the contrasting
the sober gateway of death


FelixBenson at 11:40 on 04 March 2009  Report this post
I agree with Oonah, compelling sense of an inbetween place...Especially these disquieting line in the very centre of the poem of life and death.

In my head I hear the tide. Now ghosts

are gathering here; I am expecting them.


This is rather beautiful too:

the drowsing sky
. Quite uplifting to imagine all these figures turning to look at the same beautiful horizon.


tinyclanger at 12:21 on 05 March 2009  Report this post
This is so lovely and contemplative..words and phrases that create a mood, a real atmosphere which I was experiencing as a sensory thing. 'Sober' is the word, yet rich, too. And gentle - with words like 'level', 'still', 'recede', 'drowsing'.

You say it's a reworking, James - might you have put the original up on WW - as I find something familiar in it? Like it's a place I've been to before, almost!!
The last line is a real tour-de force. Gorgeous!

x
tc

James Graham at 16:05 on 06 March 2009  Report this post
Thanks to all. tc, it's in the archive - 'Strathclyde Suite' part 3. Part 2 is 'Tribe', now published as a separate piece.

James.

freynolds at 10:00 on 07 March 2009  Report this post

I can hear both peace and torment in this poem. Majestically composed, a troubled serenity comes through.

I have also looked at the archived version (part 3) and there is part of a line I like there;"where the land falls away." It evokes both the end of the land falling into the sea and life slipping into another world.

Very inspiring work!

Fabienne

James Graham at 21:29 on 13 March 2009  Report this post
Thanks for your comment, Fabienne. 'The land falls away' I like too - but it will have to stay in limbo, I'm afraid.

There's a curious thing about the last line - it really did seem to compose itself. No thought went into it, it simply 'appeared' in finished form. I wonder if other WW poets have had that experience? All my instincts are against 'automatic writing'; there must be some semi-conscious thought process going on. But sometimes a line or an image seems to arrive out of nowhere.

James.

Tina at 09:36 on 15 March 2009  Report this post
Hello James I know I am late to this but have been having a bit of a break from poems and posting and perusing ( as you know!)

I like the lingering nature of this - the way the writer and then the reader are held in time - in a vacuous moment - absorbed by the scenery and the memory and the time. I especially like this:

Now ghosts

are gathering here; I am expecting them.
Stock-still in the sober gateway of death
they linger, looking back; like me


the sense of hovering between two worlds and yet being part of both of them. I too like the last two lines and absolutley know what you mean about lines composing themselves! In a very slight way though they are almost too good/ too rich for this poem which is about greys and half greys and pink greys and fading light - just a thought!!!

Really enjoyed thanks
Tina



To post comments you need to become a member. If you are already a member, please log in .