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Farewell to a dream

by Auds 

Posted: 03 January 2004
Word Count: 63
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I am carrying the burden of secrecy,
The price to pay for my dearest memory.
My lonely silences have become heavy
During these endless nights that offer no mercy.

Waiting for a friend to intrude my privacy,
Feeling needles and pins that would never leave me,
I was living the sweetness of a fantasy ;
A fateful day, time came to meet reality.






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Fearless at 11:58 on 04 January 2004  Report this post
Auds

Gently moving, in the way that the slightest tremor could bring walls tumbling down. The first stanza is exquisite, especially the first two lines. Write on.

Fearless
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dr_mandrill at 20:27 on 04 January 2004  Report this post
Hello Auds

I concur with Fearless: it's touching and sad, but in a very elegant and serene way.

I really like time came to meet reality.


dm
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Bobo at 20:33 on 04 January 2004  Report this post
Auds - the rhythm is itself sleepy, a gentle amble. I particularly like 'living the sweetness of a fantasy' - a lovely piece of writing - look forward to reading much more.

BoBo x
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Rai15 at 19:40 on 06 January 2004  Report this post
I agree with all who've commented so far, but also I especially like this piece because it strikes a chord so familiar to me. Hope to see more of you.

-Rai-
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eclipse at 22:13 on 02 February 2004  Report this post
Your text was very disturbing to me because that resume as near as possible a story i have lived with someone who was called Audrey Tabary too; things are brighter now; Chance doesn t mean to me anymore.
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paul53 [for I am he] at 10:52 on 08 March 2005  Report this post
An exquisite piece, but one that could possibly say more by saying less.

I carry the burden,
The price I pay.
My lonely silences
These endless nights.

Waiting for a friend,
Feeling needles and pins,
The sweetness of fantasy;
A fateful day.
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