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Bathos or Sohtab?

by Dave Morehouse 

Posted: 26 April 2012
Word Count: 148
Summary: These are a couple I submitted last month for a "Backwards" theme publication. They may border on bathos...or they may not. sorry to "mail it in" this week but the concept was a genuine struggle for me.


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pleh

This morning
For a laugh
I put my pants
On different.

Butt in front
Zips behind
Uncomfortable
Oddly exciting.

Advantages:
Wallet pocket
Where I need it
Knee bags hidden

Thinking this might
Catch on until
In the Restroom
I ask for help
----

Indecision

Twelve thirty – smile at Susie, return to desk

Twelve ten – eat two bologna with mustard sandwiches

Noon – decide not to kick chair

Eleven forty five – toss noose over beam

Eleven forty one – chug two shots of Jack D

Ten fifty five – make an excuse, go to office basement

Ten thirty four – Johnson account is gone for good

Ten thirty three – scream “good for nothing bastard”, hang up

Nine fifty – Susie buzzes “RJ is on hold regarding the bids”

Nine twenty – finish last of the Krispy Kremes

Nine oh five – arrive fashionably late






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Comments by other Members



V`yonne at 15:52 on 26 April 2012  Report this post
I like the backwards trousers one but the other is wonderful - did they get accepted? Next time you win we could do witha bit of backward thinking ;

Nella at 21:56 on 26 April 2012  Report this post
Another good laugh. Thanks, Dave.

Robin

tusker at 07:06 on 27 April 2012  Report this post
Both are funny, Dave.

I too am unsure as to what 'bathos' is, so I reckon yours are bathos.

Laughed at the first one. I could see it.

Really enjoyed the second as I loved how the day went backwards, like re-winding a tape recorder. I could feel the frustration there. I laughed, despite his angst, when I read it backwards too. Have to admit on first reading and not wearing my 'computer glasses' I first read 'noose as moose!' which had me laughing.

Put the right glasses on and all became clear. Still funny.

Jennifer

Dave Morehouse at 21:56 on 27 April 2012  Report this post
I like the backwards trousers one but the other is wonderful - did they get accepted?


I sent them to 5X5 early in March for their "Backward" theme edition. Deadline for submission is May 1 so it's unlikely they have even read them yet. Fingers crossed. Dave

V`yonne at 11:19 on 28 April 2012  Report this post
Oh finger crossed - I must hjave missed that call LUCK!


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