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Just Feelings
Posted: 20 February 2004
Word Count: 69
Summary: Ramblings
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The unstoppable splurge
Of innocuous words
Lasooed,
Tinted moods
Of unending diversity
Dissected and stretched
Over artic paginal plains.
Language glorified
Bastardised.
Phrases greedily ingested
Spat out at leisure.
But still
They are not enough
Or maybe
The expression behind them
A well run dry?
Perhaps a substitute
A half-cocked excuse
For a forgotten tongue
That civilization
Ran to ground?
As a friend recently said
‘No words.
Just feelings’.
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Comments by other Members
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 olebut at 09:41 on 20 February 2004
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Walrus
I started reading this and was taken by its pace and imagery until i reached '
The pen is mightier than the sword etc'.
Which i really think spoils an otherwise fine poem I would consider removing lines 23, 24 and 25.I dont think removing those three lines is in anyway detremental to the message and in my view improves the poem considrably.
but as I have said on here many times this is only my view and it is your poem
but good stuff
take care
david
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Fearless at 09:52 on 20 February 2004
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Words, like distance,
are a double-edged sword.
They magnify things,
but can distort too.
Feelings are true,
strong and eternal.
But what are feelings
without their expression?
This, I sometimes struggle with,
like a madman wandering in the valleys.
Are they just wishes, aspirations,
that are frequently gobbled up
by the darkness of doubt and fear,
before we try yet again?
Or is it the heartfelt attempt
to reach out at that
which we sometimes feel to be
unobtainable?
Alas, I am full of questions.
I can't help this.
But all my promises, still stand.
Will you take my hand?
The well of promise,
never runs dry my friend, my love.
<Added>
Your lyric made me think and feel on this grey morning. Thanks.
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The Walrus at 11:00 on 20 February 2004
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David, thanks, you're absolutely right. Have removed offending lines.
Fearless, how true your words. Sometimes there are no answers and so it is better not to ask, but to simply accept. Your hand I have no doubt will always be taken.
The Walrus
x
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The Walrus at 11:51 on 20 February 2004
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Ig, thanks, but I think you can do alot better... Your generous comments are always appreciated.
The Walrus
xx
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miffle at 12:09 on 20 February 2004
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Clever, dynamic, downplayed, poem flagging up the limitations of words whilst using them to great effect itself!
Especially liked the reference to the 'forgotten tongue' of a 'lost civilisation' - conjured images of Macchu Picchu for me...Also reminded me of the book 'Mutant Message Downunder' about a doctor who lives with aborigines for a year (?). The aborigines she meets communicate telephathically with one another across 1000s of miles i.e they believe that originally all humans could do this and cannot understand why the 'civilised' world has telephones.
Words too, I think, are a bit aimless, hollow until we shape them with our hearts. I think, they're sacred too, in a sense. If you want to know the secret of something or get closer to it or steal its power you ask for its name, its pearl...
Write on, miffle ;-)
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miffle at 12:11 on 20 February 2004
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NB Agree with David - better without those lines...
'a forgotten tongue' the language we spoke before we were born? the language of the spheres, the heavens, the soul? I think there is one (?)...
nikki :-)
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The Walrus at 12:46 on 20 February 2004
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Nikki, fascinated to hear about 'Mutant Message Downunder'. Yes, agree words can be sacred. There is no doubt, they are powerful.
Re: your comments about 'forgotten tongue' - yes, possibly all of these things. Really got me thinking now! Hmmm. 'Advancement' has stripped us of so much.
The Walrus
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miffle at 13:32 on 20 February 2004
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The book is by Marlo Morgan. I just searched for it on the internet and it seems it's been discredited (unknown to me) i.e. the author claimed to have lived with an aboriginal tribe, it now appears that her account was purely fictional...Hmmm, turns the book and its portrayal of aboriginals on its head now...miffle NB 'advancement' yes, worth a thought or two!
<Added>
* meant aborigines (isn't 'aboriginals' a derogative term?)
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The Walrus at 13:40 on 20 February 2004
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Thanks Nikki. You are a mine of such interesting and pertinent info.
The Walrus
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