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still

by dr_mandrill 

Posted: 01 May 2004
Word Count: 160


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Wet earth and moss-
a soft landing
and for once a full
stop.

I watch the clouds,
now thereís nothing else to do;
some take the shapes of things Iíve seen,
but most are just cloud-shaped.
They make me sad, those no-name clouds.
They are the thoughts I canít have and now
I know I havenít seen enough.

This oneís a bear-
I fought a bear this year
and a lion and a crocodile.
There was a tiger,
big as a horse,
and some sharks that looked like people.
Thatís a lot of teeth; a lot of hooked claws
tearing off the best of me.
And now the grass grows tall feeding on my blood,
but itís ok:
Iím done with bleeding.

Thereís a turtle, Sculpted
in egg-white peaks!
I show him my very best smile-
maybe the sun will bleach it white like bones
in the desert.
Iíll lie here and grin a skeleton grin,
a cloud-white grin,
forever.






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Comments by other Members



Fearless at 14:35 on 01 May 2004  Report this post
You were struck - as was I, reading this. A very welcome lyric on a grey Saturday. I liked the third stanza very much. Write on Ian,

Woz

roovacrag at 18:02 on 01 May 2004  Report this post
Ian.
Very well done loved each stanza.
Like woz i would choose the third stanza.
I'm done with bleeding. good line.
xx Alice

The Walrus at 08:03 on 02 May 2004  Report this post
Inspired. The whole cloud/self thing had me entranced. Funny how we sometimes see ourselves/our lives reflected in the natural world. Love the turtle 'Sculpted in egg-white peaks'.

Damn good piece dm.

The Walrus

Sparrow_splitter at 13:43 on 02 May 2004  Report this post
This was great and all that. The 3rd bit reminded me of dumb-ass children talking jive about what they saw at the zoo or something. I would have put a ray in there somewhere slapping you in the face like what they do to me. I like the use of the word bear and the use of bears. I once saw a bear kick another bear up the arse and then run off.

Sparrow



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