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WHAT OF LIFE
Posted: 21 July 2004
Word Count: 96
Summary: Could be a country/western song.
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Working till the hours of dawn,
nothing to show but my scorn,
canvas bare nothing on,
just a blank page.
Has my life just passed me by?
cannot even reach the sky
wanting, waiting,all in fear
have I wasted every year?
Watch the seasons young and old,
seen the mysteries all unfold
what of life to become,
do we have one?
What kind of future do we have?
any,is that a fact,
or is there time to make amends
gather all our closest friends.
Should we party?
feel just hearty
or help all
our future friends.
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Comments by other Members
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 Mooncat at 11:06 on 21 July 2004
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Roovacrag,
I liked this - it reminds us all that life should not be wasted.
Marie
<Added>
Yes - I can see it as a country/western song.
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roovacrag at 11:18 on 21 July 2004
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Mooncat..never waste one moment of your life or of your loved one. Only comes once so make the most of it.
xx Alice
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 joanie at 11:28 on 21 July 2004
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Alice, we all do it, don't we? Thank you - a good reminder to make us assess what's important.
joanie
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roovacrag at 11:31 on 21 July 2004
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Joan thanks for comment. Yes I just realised I am getting older.
Wish everyone would stop reminding me its my birthday again next week.
xx Alice
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LONGJON at 00:44 on 22 July 2004
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To hell with the birthdays, alice - have a bit of fun, do us a birthday poem!
John P.
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olebut at 07:35 on 22 July 2004
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Alice
good sentiments in line 5 should that be passed not past ?
and was it deliberate to change the rhthym pattern between verses? if so in vers e one perhaps a comma at the end of line 3
as for birthdays mine was last monday so why worry be happy
take acre
and happy 21st for next week
david xx
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roovacrag at 15:04 on 22 July 2004
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David many thanks. Can't believe I put past and not passed.
One day I will get it right.
Thanks my friend.
xx Alice.
If I'm 21 you must be a swinging teenager.AAHH Rock n roll.
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Account Closed at 10:32 on 26 July 2004
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Hi Alice,
Your poems are always so true and they resonate well in my mind every time I read them fresh.
Never a wasted year when you can write as well as this.
This could me a country and western song, slow and deep with a rough-gravel voice.
Ste
x
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TheGodfather at 04:08 on 28 July 2004
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Alice,
Well-conveyed message. I like the rhythm and repeating of the various questions, a nice effect. I wondered if you realized that the first stanza lacks on the incomplete rhymes like the other stanzas have. All the other stanzas have crafted rhymes except the first. Something to maybe look at. Good work.
TheGodfather
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roovacrag at 06:56 on 28 July 2004
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Steve,Godfather,many thanks to you both.
Will check the first stanza again.
xx Alice
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