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On Stanage Edge

by Montog 

Posted: 01 September 2004
Word Count: 89
Summary: With winter approaching and the poor summer we have had my mind wonders to the weather to come.
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On Stanage Edge in Derbyshire
One winter's day I stood
To view the snowy landscape
In my karrimoor with hood

The granite rocks looked black and cold
Against the icy ground
The grouse had gone to restaurants
There was no sound around

The clear blue sky was featureless
It framed the barren moor
What once was green with purple tips
Is white and quite obscure

In awe I stare at nothingness
Which really is bizarre
I'll stroll back down to the Yorkshire Bridge
And get warm by the fire






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Comments by other Members



olebut at 16:55 on 01 September 2004  Report this post
Montog what an image packed piece i can see my self standing there now or more likely heating up by the fire. I think one of teh beauties of poetry is that you can take the reader to a place so vividly with so few words and make them live your images. In this work you have achieve dthat well doen

take care
david
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roovacrag at 21:39 on 02 September 2004  Report this post
MONTOG. Spent hours up there as a child and teenager.
Brought back memories for me. The view is worth a pound a blink just to see it. Bloody cold in winter,freeze the socks off.

Well done.
xx Alice
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Montog at 14:21 on 15 September 2004  Report this post
Thanks for the comment Alice and David,
My mind often wanders up to the moors when I'm sat in the office staring at a blank wall.
Montog
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lieslj at 11:30 on 17 September 2004  Report this post
Greetings Montog,

I thought your scansion was excellent but for the second last line, where an extra syllable sent the rhythm a little off kilter.

How about:
I'll stroll back over Yorkshire Bridge?

There were a couple of typos too:
"winters" needs an apostrophe

and "Ill" does too

Fabulous line, the grouse gone to the restaurants!

Thoroughly enjoyed this lovely verse.

Liesl
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Montog at 15:40 on 20 September 2004  Report this post
Thanks for the typos and comments LieslJ,
The second last line is in reference to the pub The Yorkshire Bridge, I thought it sounded OK but will ponder.
Montog
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Carlton at 01:20 on 22 October 2004  Report this post
Great rythm, really bowls along. I like it.
Couldn't you "stroll back down t'Yorkshire Bridge"?
Carlton
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Montog at 14:08 on 24 October 2004  Report this post
Yeah, that sounds good Carlton Thanks
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