 Nell at 07:49 on 27 November 2004
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Joanie, brilliant! I especially love those surreal images and the words in the last stanza. You've taken just the right amount of inspiration from Selima Hill for you - isn't it wonderful where these exercises lead/take us?
Nell.
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 joanie at 07:58 on 27 November 2004
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Thank you for commenting, Nell, and for the reassurance that it wasn't total piffle. Yes, it is fantastic where these exercises lead and take us; I most certainly would not have written much of what I have done without them. I enjoy looking at poets I wouldn't normally have read too. Wonderful!
Thanks.
joanie
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 Elsie at 10:04 on 27 November 2004
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Joanie, well done. For some reason I thought you were talking about a pig with that first hair, then I realised it was about getting older. Then came more animals and insects - just like Selima. Love the expression set up stall and stay, aand the sans-problemes.
Elsie
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 tinyclanger at 13:53 on 27 November 2004
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Those first two stanzas could be written in praise(?) of my other half - if he ever gets to the third I'm outta here....
I enjoyed the ordinaryness of this, Joanie, the everyday language in those first verses, and then the surreal shift in the last one - very Selima, I thought. I even felt you could have wandered about with it a bit more at the end, gone further into the conceit, since you set it up so well with such frank observation in the first stanzas!
I just wanna know, where does all that hair come from, all of a sudden? And why isn't any of it where it's SUPPOSED to be??
x
tc
<Added>
Check out the Google ads with this one. Tee Hee!
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joanie at 14:08 on 27 November 2004
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Thanks, tc. Wow! the ads are much better than the poem!
joanie
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joanie at 14:49 on 27 November 2004
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Elsie, sorry, I forgot to say thank you for your comment. I was too busy looking at the ads after tc's comment!
I'm pleased that you thought it was Selima-like.
Thanks
joanie
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roovacrag at 19:15 on 27 November 2004
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Joan..I think you grabbed what Seline was saying and you have done a great job with the poem.
Well done.
XXAlice
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Elsie at 23:53 on 27 November 2004
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Joanie - ads? what ads? Oh, blimey - I've just noticed - gotta go and check someother postings!
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Elsie at 23:56 on 27 November 2004
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Um, so why did my latest get these? Foot Fetish
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Stinky poem?
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Elsie at 23:59 on 27 November 2004
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Aha, got it - stockinged feet = foot odour problem. This is fun!
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lieslj at 04:54 on 28 November 2004
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A wry look at the indignities of aging done with levity and wit.
I'm not entirely sure I understand why a manicured front lawn blasts the "it wasn't"s into the hornet's nest. It is possible that there is a cultural reference that I'm missing, but more likely that I'm having a dense day.
Until that point I felt confident that I knew where I was in the poem, and enjoyed the offbeat humour.
Best
L
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joanie at 13:01 on 28 November 2004
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Thanks for reading, Liesl. The last verse meant that the writer can put up with all the other things, but once growing older means that you have to spend hours a week making sure that the small patch of grass outside the house has to resemble a snooker table, it's too much.
The whole thing was as a result of Selima Hill's poem; I'm not sure how much that makes it a bit 'odd'; perhaps I was trying too hard and missed the mark.
Thanks.
joanie
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lieslj at 18:54 on 28 November 2004
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Definitely a cultural reference, Joanie! The middle class practically NEVER mow their own lawns in SA. There are just so many unemployed casual labourers who will do it for a relatively small sum, hence I missed the significance.
I don't think you're trying to hard. I think it works just fine if you have the perspective of a British senior citizen, rather than a South African spoiled by cheap and plentiful hired help.
L
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The Walrus at 19:35 on 28 November 2004
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Too inept to track down Poetry Seminar, but strangely enough I am acquainted with Selima Hill's 'Wasp' poem - disturbingly vicious.
Diverse, and as ever well written Joanie.
Christina
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joanie at 19:35 on 28 November 2004
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Thanks again, Liesl! The cultural differences are very interesting, aren't they?
joanie
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joanie at 19:42 on 28 November 2004
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Thank you Christina. I wasn't acquainted with it before I started in Poetry Seminar. I'm glad you think it works.
Thank you for reading and responding.
joanie
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Don Gorgon at 20:25 on 29 November 2004
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joanie, I've no idea what this is all about and that's probably why I like it so much! I love all the 'hair' business, the nose and ears made me think of me Dad, and
'into the outside world and liking
what it saw so much that it decided to
set up stall and stay;'
I was, and am now, laughing like a gibbering fool sat here reading those lines, fanfreakingtastic! I had a look at work to see if we have any Selima Hill stuff, but we haven't, typical library! Google it is then!
This was very much appreciated here joanie, nice one!
Thanks
Don
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joanie at 21:23 on 29 November 2004
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Don.... always enthusiastic and supportive! Thank you so much!
joanie
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Okkervil at 18:55 on 04 December 2004
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Wee, liked this. Partly 'cos I was astonished to see my Grandad there so vividly- right down to the track-suit bottoms and slippers! Goodness. I guess also there is indeed Don's dad and my future nephew's Uncle. Perreniality and all that. Also, naturally, brilliantly written- I loved the last stanza- though at first didn't quite get it- most, excellently magnitudinal. I like this poem dearly.
Bye!
James
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joanie at 20:31 on 04 December 2004
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James - thank you so much!! I really do appreciate it.
joanie
<Added>
Just read your profile again.. you were born on Christmas Day!! My daughter's birthday is 22nd December - that's bad enough!!
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Okkervil at 20:55 on 06 December 2004
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Christmas Day's great! It's low-key and happy, 'cos Jesus takes precedent, so i can just enjoy the food.
<Added>
I mean, y'know, Christmas Day Birthdays. Everybody knows Christmas Day is great.
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laurafraser at 13:52 on 07 December 2004
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what a funky piece! really enjoyed reading this clever, witty and unque poem,
wonderful!
xlaura
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gard at 23:58 on 08 January 2005
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Hi Joanie
just read this, very good (has a touch of the wicked sense of humour about it) ! All of the above!
G
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