BLUE by LONGJON - WriteWords.org.uk

BLUE

by LONGJON ( 1790 )

Posted: 03 December 2004
Word Count: 102
Summary: Part of exercise

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Through misplaced snapshot suns,
Sitting in shrouded, dust cloaked dark.
I wonder at the endless, endless blue,

Cold and still, cold and still that once
Flew wild the whirling blade, silent now
I wonder at the endless, endless blue.

That sundered blue I drove, catleaping,
The building through,now mocked by dust,
I wonder at the endless, endless blue.

An impotent rage the godbeams see,
In death watch stillness, bereft of you,
I wonder at the endless, endless blue.

And the end of days a creeping sexton brings,
On a stinking heap, in a fading breeze,
I wonder at the endless, endless blue.

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Comments by other Members

Posted by : LONGJON at 23:29 on 03 December 2004

Revamped to meet the three line requirement.
John P.

Posted by : Lawrenco at 23:15 on 09 December 2004

I know i`m a bit late posting etc...
I did like this ode to a fan ,I presume Catleap is cat leap (got me going that did.)How appriecative you were of the fan,before its demise or is it just resting ..Nice one John.

Posted by : Epona Love at 22:07 on 29 December 2004

I really enjoyed the imagery and the tone of this, really quite a dark feel... and considering the fan aspect of the exercise you have captured a sense of human mortality with its demise.
full of wonder (wonderful)

Emma x.

Posted by : gard at 00:35 on 05 January 2005

Hi LongJon

I have not read the exercise. I do like your language in your poems and this piece too.

Through misplaced snapshot suns,
Sitting in shrouded, dust cloaked dark.
I wonder at the endless, endless blue,

lovely introduction. The last verse does indeed have a dark tone to it.

Lovely rhythm and flow in each verse.

G

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