|
|
 |
On a delicate morning
Posted: 04 April 2005
Word Count: 14
Summary: The beginning of a new day brings remorse, the opportunity to contemplate breaking old patterns and a thirst for knowledge, not to mention water.
Related Works: Birdwatching in the city •
|
Font Size
|
|
Strong morning headrush...
Room a harsh, blurred, spinning place.
I may still be drunk.
|
Comments by other Members
| |
 Beanie Baby at 21:25 on 04 April 2005
 Report this post
|
Hello Paul.
This made me smile - we've all been there! Nice to have you in the haiku and short poetry group. I've recently become the group host so if there's anything I can do, let me know. One little comment - this is more in line with Senryu as opposed to Haiku because, although the syllable pattern is the same - Haiku normally feature a reference to nature and the season, whereas Senryu, illustrate 'life in the fast lane' - usually with a touch of humour which this clearly has. Thank you for sharing.
Beanie Baby
| |
|
|
|
|
shandypockets at 16:20 on 05 April 2005
Report this post
|
Thank you for the interesting distinction, there, Beanie. I have a feeling I may a Senryu boy. That's really good to know. Thanks all for the comments and the warm welcome. Paul
| |
 joanie at 22:29 on 05 April 2005
Report this post
|
I'll add my welcome, Paul! Nice Haiku/Senryu - whatever! Know what you mean!
joanie
| |
lieslj at 06:41 on 09 April 2005
Report this post
|
A neatly observed sensation. Succinct and sore, all at the same time.
Well done.
Liesl
| |
Nik Perring at 22:25 on 09 April 2005
Report this post
|
Paul,
Great piece. It really put a smile on my face. I know exactly what you mean! Empathy a plenty from this member!
Cheers,
Nik.
| |
| |
Comments by other Members
