I’ve decided that having a baby is a stupid idea. I am far too poor and far too irresponsible. Last week, I forgot to feed my Facebook puppy and it died. I was secretly happy about this. Feeding it was a goddamn palaver, and all I had to do was throw cartoon dog biscuits at it.

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I have been asked to collaborate on a project which I think will be really cool.

It is an art book. It will contain photographs and very short stories. The photographs are Katherine Lewis'. The stories will be inspired by those photographs (a little bit like what super Sarah Salway's been doing of late).

Now, I'll not kid you. It's not going to be a bestseller. It's not going to be available in bookshops. It's going to be produced locally, and any profit it makes will go to charity. But it will be very beautiful, I'm sure of that.

And I thought it'd be rather cool if you were involved. So if you'd like to be one of the 20 contributors all you need to do is write a 50 (ish) word poem or short story inspired by the above photograph. Post your story either in my comments box or email it to me by next Wednesday (29th April). One winner will be picked a little while after that, and that winner will receive a free copy of the finished book.

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Dear Jargon,

Of all the euphemisms in all the world, you had to walk into mine. Words cannot express how surprised I was to see you today. If I'd known you were coming, I'd have realigned my facial expressions to standard neutral (Authorised Version 0.2) lest you detected from the furrow of my brow the rather negative way in which I internally framed your presence.


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Our very own Caroline Rance's debut novel, "Kill-Grief" has just been published and we have a signed copy to give away to one lucky reader who comments on this post, below. The winner will be drawn from a hat and their name will be posted up on Sunday. (Sorry, Strictly Writers are not eligible!)

Check out Caroline's website, http://www.carolinerance.co.uk/ and her blogs, Writing and all that and The Quack Doctor


Who is your literary hero?
Emily Brontë

Which 3 writers, living or dead, would you invite to dinner?
Dorothy Parker, Bill Bryson and Garrison Keillor

What's your favourite writing snack?
Salted peanuts, or cheese and onion crisps. Or Lindor chocolates. Or anything edible, really.

Win Booker prize or land Hollywood film deal?
Film deal.

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I was told, last night, by the lovely folks at the library where I run my writing group that the event we/they put on for World Book Day (I blogged about it here here and here) raised the most money in the area for Book Aid.

So three cheers for the library. Three cheers for the group who read wonderfully. And three cheers to all my supercool author chums who donated their books to be raffled.

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So, one week you're extremely pleased that a story of yours has appeared in an extremely cool place (3 :AM). And then the next week that extremely cool place mentions a band who a) you grew up listening to and b) influenced you hugely (The Clash). And then you notice that they've interviewed a member of that band.

Very cool.

And to celebrate...

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Just as an avid reader will have a favourite book, there will be another bookworm who has a favourite store. For me, it's the branch of Barnes and Noble in the Gramercy/Flatiron district of New York. Nestled in Union Square, the store boasts a relaxed atmosphere and unlike a lot of other bookshops, you can browse (and read!) until you heart's content.

Gleaned from Wikipedia...Barnes and Noble, dating back to 1893, is the largest book retailer in the United States, many of which have a Starbucks instore - yum, smell that coffee. There are 798 shops across the 50 states. And apparently the original bookstore was located at 31 West 15th St, having opened during World War I. This one at Union Square has featured in several movies, including Conspiracy Theory (1997, featuring Mel Gibson).

Having visited in early 2007 and went on the rampage with my credit card (nine books bought in total, including some hard-to-find-in-the-UK Larry McMurtry), nothing would stop me in my quest to re-visit this Barnes and Noble the following Christmas - not even the yellow tape the NYPD uses to seal off crime scenes! Seeing the police tape stretching out in front of me as I meandered down Broadway, my heart pounded. The light canter turned into a fully-fledged run....closer...then closer.....phew....thankfully the tape had just about spared the door of Barnes and Noble (and was attached, I think, to Bath and Body Works, or Sephora instead) so I went in for another visit. Never mind the full-scale alert, I was inside.



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I was a bit sceptical when asked to review this slim volume of five, each story set in a different country, especially as the point of view is resolutely male. However, I was swept along by the strong voice and the authentic settings . The blurb says they are 'redolent of Maughan (sic) and Hemingway'; for me they they recall DH Lawrence's intensity and sense of 'otherness', whether of place or state of mind.


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