Lord H has been wondering recently about buying a Mac instead of a PC to replace one of our computers, and now it's arrived, hurrah! What a wonderful machine it is too - so scarily modern, with everything in-built. Weird. It even has Office software, so everything looks fairly similar to what we're used to. We're calling it Morris, if you're asking. It'll be Lord H's computer, but if we like it, then I suspect I'm going to get one too. Though we'll be keeping a PC, just in case. As you do. I fear the time will come, m'dears, when we'll have to get a larger flat, just to put our computers in. Lordy, but we're sad ...

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My shoes are too big. I bought them in Aberdeen the other month, at the end of a tiring and boozy weekend with Carrie.
‘This is the best time to buy shoes,’ she said, ‘when your feet are swollen.’

Apparently not, for me - it must’ve been the accumulation of champagne, white wine, lager, vodka & coke, Tia Maria and Cointreau & lemonade...of course, the cakes and chocolate wouldn’t have helped either, nor all the standing at bars.

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Julian Barnes is the award winning author of over 10 novels, two of which have picked up Booker nominations. In the past he has been, amongst other things, the deputy literary editor for The Sunday Times, the London Correspondent for the New Yorker magazine and has appeared on Desert Island Discs . He currently lives in London.

He latest book is Nothing to be Frightened of.

Tell me a bit about yourself.

Six foot two,

Eyes of blue -

Will that do?

Faulkner said a writer's obituary should consists of the line: 'He wrote books, then he died.' Not a bad anonymity to aim at, but nowadays impossible. So: born in Leicester, studied modern languages at school and university, became a lexicographer (so not afraid of words) then read for the bar (so not afraid of lawyers) then became a journalist and novelist. Supports Leicester City (so not afraid of defeat)



What's your ideal night out/in?

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I'm feeling very old just now. I think it's partly the result of having slogged my creative and emotional guts out this week getting the novel to within spitting distance of 30,000 words. It is exhausting, this writing business.

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I must say what a glorious sunshiney day it's been today. As an old acquaintance used to say, it's a "trumpety Hadyn-y day". And who's to say he was wrong? Anyway, there's far too much ruddy rhyme in those previous sentences than is strictly good for us (not to mention overuse of the word "day"), so I'll carry on and hope for some decent prose. So here goes (oh no, not another one ...!): Marian and I have thrashed the life out of the golf course this morning and came out with exactly the same score. That never happens. This means she's done very well and I've done very badly. Sigh. Still, I was quite happy with my attempted shot over the pond which landed on the very edge and stayed there. Hurrah! Thank the Lord for that conveniently placed nettle patch which kept my ball from the wet ...

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- to follow on from Not writing



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Goodness me, but what a long way it is to York. A jolly long way. And even further back - did they make the M1 longer while I was up there?? I wouldn't put it past them. Anyway I had a surprisingly good time at the AUA Conference - it might even have been, on a personal level, the most enjoyable one so far. Partly because hey, it's York. And in the sunshine, it's an amazing city. I also teamed up with Miv and the rest of the gang from Surrey wherever possible, which made networking less terrifying, frankly. Networking is much like DIY, I suppose - if you can't do it alone (and I can't - in both cases), then do it together. As they say. Also the food on the Gala Dinner tonight (Tuesday) was fabulous and (typical Yorkshire) there was lots of it. Hurrah! There's nothing worse than Nouvelle Cuisine, in my opinion, which is simply another way of saying Not Enough Food. I also sat at the table which won the champagne, so - hick! - we were all right, Jack ...

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How has the site developed over time?


We have a lot more literary professionals involved now, including editors from Orion and Bloomsbury who provide free Arts Council funded critiques for the five highest rated writers each month. We also have a lot more leading affiliated literary agents. From the start of April The Random House Group will become involved with YouWriteOn.com and read our Top Ten Chart stories at the start of each month for a six month period.

I see that you recently started a joint venture with Legend Books. How did that come about?

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Remember Yoka from Egg Wars? That was the eggy diorama that my daughter and her friends created for their school decorate-an-egg competition last year. If you go back and read that post, you'll discover that their entry won the prize for their year. Well, competition time came round again. The pressure was on. Not only that, her younger brother was also eligible to enter this year.

The entries were judged last week, but in a move reminiscent of the Zimambwean elections, but obviously so much more trivial that I almost feel ashamed making the comparison, the relevant authorities have only just announced the winners today.


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