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  • Critique
    by SpikeFox87 at 16:10 on 18 February 2020
    Why Does It Hurt?
    Hun, tell me a story, tell me a good story
    Tell me youre with me, through grieving and glory
    Please, dear lover, don't cast me to the side
    I'm really quite useful, tell me what to do, and I'll abide
    Come my children, gather ‘round for my preachings
    I gaze at the stars, some beyond my own reaching
    I promised I’d come back. Im no longer sleeping 
    The night is still young, I am up and moving in this room
    Questions circling my head, like a race car going “zoom!”
    Its ten in the evening, you hear the wolves howling sadly
    For they aren't much different fro me, and yes that hurts badly
    Don't forget me, dont think Im a lost cause to you
    Because I made sure your we loved and approved
    The moon is rising, its beams shattering nightfall
    I'm in the fields of grass, kneeling as i let out a call
    A mourning, deep and emotional sound I cry out
    “Why does it hurt so much?” I wanted to shout
    Blood runs through my veins, red as it runs from my hands
     Never thought it would hurt this much, you don't understand
    There's something I must tell you. don't be shy
    In love and war, I must stay true to the skies.
    You fight not to be my friend, constantly deny
    You never knew me from the start, to you I'm just another guy

  • Re: Critique
    by art12 at 15:04 on 25 February 2021
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    Edited by art12 at 15:15:00 on 25 February 2021